There is a difference between girlfriend/significant other/relationship and a family.
When you are in a relationship with someone, communication is a big thing. If you do not communicate with your partner and explain to them what the plastic crack means to you then how can they possibly understand? To them it's just little plastic toys you spend hundreds of dollars on every month just to take hours upon hours assembling and painting. Women don't usually get introduced to miniatures or wargaming so unless you explain it to them or at least show them the process, they won't usually understand. However, I am sure once you have explained it to them they will realize it's more than just "little toys you play with".
I could go into even more detail but I think many of you know how relationships
should work.
When you get to the family stage you cannot go out and blindly spend the hundreds to thousands of dollars on your favourite plastic models you used to be able to do when you were single or first started dating said person. When kids, mortgages, bill payments, soccer teams, school fundraisers, ballet classes, etc start creeping up, the smart thing a couple should do is sit down and prioritize their finances.
Raising kids is expensive, they eat everything, grow out of clothes too fast and the amount of school trips, fundraisers, events, etc they like to throw down your throat adds up. Get to the stage where there are after school activities, sport teams, ballet classes, swimming lessons, etc and half the time you wonder if you ever get your own free time! When you become a family, sometimes sacrifices are needed. This doesn't mean you must sell off everything, but it may mean you must limit yourself.
Wargaming is addicting. You need to be able to balance your wargaming needs with your family needs. If you cannot, something needs to be done (or has to go) and it is usually the greatest decision to choose your family over your models.
Sometimes unexpected things come up (like your family dog got hit by a car and has hundreds of dollars of vet bills or little Timmy got super sick and needs medication after medication) and you might have to sell things you might not have ever wanted to before. If getting 300 dollars from an army will help your financial needs at that moment in time, sometimes you have to do it. Can you buy models back? Yes. Can you buy back your child or family dog (that current one, not talking about just getting a new one)? No, not usually unless you know necromancy but even then after watching movies and shows, that
usually isn't the best path to proceed down.
So when there comes a time when you want to go attend some function and it boils down to finding a babysitter, travel expenses, the cost of the ticket, money you are most likely going to spend there, etc, you need to discuss it with your significant other. Can you afford it? Are there any bills or other money related things/issues you need to worry about? There is more to it than just "Hey [wife] I'm heading to [event], kiss kids for me, cheerio!"
When you want to start a new army, you should also take the above into consideration. Let's be reasonable here, starting a new army isn't cheap. Warhammer armies could range to easily 2-300 just to get a good basic starter force. Other universes can be around the same, although yes usually less. Still, you cannot just go walk into the store, pick up 300 dollars worth of plastic. You must first talk it over with your significant other to make sure there is nothing happening that spending that 300 dollars on will bite you in your tush.
There is more to it than just "I think I only need to ask permission to do something on time obligated to someone else(job) or if I am utilizing the possessions of someone else".
When you're in a relationship sure I can agree to an extent, when you're in a family I disagree. If a person believes they don't need to ask permission (and by that I mean talking it over with your significant other) before doing something that may effect their family as a whole, they need to rethink their priorities.
Gaijin18 wrote:I am sorry but a relationship is supposed to be a two way street
This.
Communication, communication, communication!
ChickenHide wrote:It makes me really sad when I read a post saying "My wife says the Warhammer has to go" or "My girlfriend gave me permission to attend".
Re: Wife says the Warhammer has to go: You never know the issues behind this. People don't usually come to forums expressing their personal issues. Therefore there could be something really personal or urgent behind this. However, this could also mean the [wife] wants a bunch to go and the member is reducing his army down. Not ridding it entirely.
I don't automatically assume the wife is evil. However, I am sure there are cases where the wife
is evil.
Re: Girlfriend giving permission to attend: You also do not know the details behind their money situation. It is not cheap attending functions, perhaps they are in a tough situation. New baby, someone got laid off, etc. As a gamer, you
want to go, as a significant other, you tend to remind the gamer about priorities. Sometimes that means not going, so "having permission to go" might not be exactly what you read it as.
jason1977 wrote:There are alot worse things one can spend money and time on other than plastic toy models.
Like plastic models. Think.
Very true. My wife is content with my plastic addiction. Sometimes I get carried away but usually I am smart with balancing it with everything else. Plus, she likes knowing where I am on Warhammer nights and when I'm in the other room spending my evening working on plastic models. She also likes painting them so when i get to that stage it's something we enjoy doing together. She used to have a Grey Knight army but ended up selling it. She was getting bored with the immense amount of rules LOL.
TL;DR: So, all in all, there is more behind the picture than an evil girlfriend/wife. Judging a person on the choice of words on an internet forum isn't the greatest thing to do. I am sure in some cases you are correct, but overall I must disagree with your assessment. There is just way more behind it than a person
not in the situation can understand. Plus, sometimes people like to pass the "blame" onto the wife because you as a member will never talk to their wife/significant other. Don't read into it so drastically.
